Field Notes #7: You Don’t Need to Buy A Cold Plunge!

The Situation

A CEO once told us they were thinking about installing a cold plunge. They wanted to become a more compassionate leader, and they remembered something we had talked about: when we’re better able to regulate our emotions, it becomes easier to respond to other people with compassion.

They had the right idea. When someone brings us a problem and our body goes straight into alarm, it’s hard to stay curious about what they’re experiencing. We may get defensive, rush to fix things, or say something we wish we hadn’t. But we told the CEO they didn’t need to buy a cold plunge to practice this.

Practicing the Pause

Emotional regulation isn’t about staying calm all the time. It’s about noticing what’s happening in your body, helping your body to feel safe, and having a little more choice about what you do next.

You can practice that without buying anything. Hold a few ice cubes for a moment and notice your urge to drop them. Turn the shower cool for a few seconds, if that feels okay for your body. When someone cuts you off in traffic, notice the heat rising in your chest without chasing them down the road or rehearsing an argument all the way home.

You can also practice in the middle of an ordinary workday. Feel your feet on the floor before a difficult meeting. Take one breath before answering an email that makes you angry. Ask for a minute when you need one.

None of these moments magically makes us compassionate. They give us a chance to notice discomfort without needing to react to it. And that chance matters when an employee is upset, a colleague disagrees with us, or someone tells us we’ve caused harm. The practice is to recognize that reaction, care for ourselves in it, and then decide how we want to respond.

The CEO could have bought the cold plunge. But the opportunities to practice were already showing up every day.

Your Turn...

Think about the last time you felt defensive at work. What did you notice in your body? What did you do next?

Where is one small moment this week when you could pause before responding?

Field Notes is a series of leadership dilemmas drawn from real organizational life. The aim is to help us all lead with more humanity.

Know someone who might find this useful? Forward it to them, or invite them to subscribe to Field Notes.